Original Author: Ariel Goodbody
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The Pumpkin Jug
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Genre: RomanceSetting: FairytaleNew Vocabulary: A good match, Bow (verb), Come into season, Fit, Hole, Impossible, Jug, Landslide victory, Pick (flowers), Poppy, Pumpkin, Rule (noun), ThirstyWord Count: 1348Original Author: Ariel GoodbodyA king meets a woman who grows pumpkins. She gives him water in a dirty old jug, and then she breaks it. The king thinks this is strange, but he likes the woman. So he gives her a challenge: if she can put a big pumpkin in a small jug, he will marry her. But she cannot break the jug or the pumpkin. Can she do it?
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Misty the Snake (Rerun)
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Genre: ComedySetting: ModernNew Vocabulary: Bubble wrap, Ex, Lick, Marmite, Owner, Parcel, Prison bars, Put a bounty on someone’s head, Queue, Sneak, Tongue, YeastWord Count: 1457Original Author: Ariel GoodbodyMisty the Snake loves eating other people’s pets. This does not make the people of the United Kingdom happy. So her owner takes her to Brazil, but really she wants to go home to Ghana…
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Doing Evil Part 2
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Genre: PhilosophicalSetting: ModernNew Vocabulary: ‘Even if I die trying’, A-level, Brush yourself off, Detention, Do-gooder, Frame someone for something, Indoctrination, Oxbridge, PE, Practically vibrating, Put your head down, Ripple, Theology, Wet the bedWord Count: 4021Original Author: Ariel GoodbodyTobias arrives at St Gummarus’ School for Nasty Children. At first, he thinks his parents might have made a mistake, because all the kids here are badly behaved and nasty. But he soon realises that deep down, they are good, and they’re threatening his mission to do evil. So Tobias decides to use goodness as a weapon…
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Doing Evil Part 1
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Genre: PhilosophicalSetting: ModernNew Vocabulary: A cross to bear, Atheist, Boarding school, Bullying, Chapel, Evil, Host (Christianity), Hypocrisy, Lord, Mass, Rota, Satan, Seven deadly sins, Spit, Tabernacle, Test the watersWord Count: 3625Original Author: Ariel GoodbodyWhen Tobias’s parents ask him what he wants to be when he grows up, he says, ‘Evil.’ There’s just one problem: his parents are devoted Christians! As Tobias does more and more bad things, his parents try to find ways to make him good, until finally there is only one option left…
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Rapunzel, Rapunzel, Cut Off Your Hair
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Genre: RomanceSetting: FairytaleNew Vocabulary: Chew, Get caught on, Loom, Nail, Pharmacist, Scalp, Starve, Suit of armour, Sword, Trapped, Treat someone likeWord Count: 3658Original Author: Ariel GoodbodyAn old couple wish for a son and instead have a daughter with long, magical hair. They don’t see the value in it, and sell her off to an old man who keeps her in a tower. Every day, he massages the oil from her hair and sells it. But the girl gets tired of this life, and makes a plan to escape…
Strange Friends (Advanced)
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Genre: Children’sSetting: FairytaleNew Vocabulary: “For all the good it will do you”, Altar, Christening, Crumbs, Disposition, Fantasise, Godmother, Kitty, Might as well, Ponder, SavourWord Count: 1554Original Author: Ariel GoodbodyA cat and a mouse live together as friends, and what strange friends that makes! One day, the cat suggests they store some food for the winter, so they buy a pot of fat and hide it in a church. But while the mouse happily cleans the house, the cat starts to think about the food…
A Visitor from Chilly Bottom
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Genre: ComedySetting: UKNew Vocabulary: Bonkers, Butler, Captive, Chilly, Colony, Crumbs, Furrow your brow, Poo, Press release, Regurgitate, Royal seal, Spit, Tailcoat, Waddle, WorshipWord Count: 3272A man who has lived in Antarctica all his life visits the UK for the first time. Technically, he is a British citizen, as he grew up on British Antarctic Territory. And he has an important message for the king! It’s just that, the king has no idea who this man is…
Let’s Write a Story Together! with Alastair Budge
In this episode, I brainstorm a story with Alastair Budge. We start with the concept of someone from Antarctica moving to London and experiencing culture shock and peculiarities of life in the UK. We come up with cultural references and humorous situations involving misunderstandings about British culture. After this episode, Alastair went off and wrote the story, which I then edited, and next week you’ll be able to hear the recorded version.
A Crooked Old House
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Genre: HorrorSetting: UKNew Vocabulary: Association, Crooked, Drain (noun), Fern, Hook, Moisture, Plumber, Pretend, Roll, Warp (wood), Zip-lineWord Count: 1753Original Author: Ariel GoodbodyAn old man lives in an old house. The house is so old that it has changed shape and many things are broken. Every day, the man must climb up a big hill to get to the kitchen. Lots of people tell him he needs to leave the house, but the old man refuses. But one day, the house makes sure he will never leave.
What Makes a Snake
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Genre: DramaSetting: ModernNew Vocabulary: Dread, Drill down, Filing cabinet, Get the memo, Line manager, Minutes, Piss, Scroll (computer), Sexual harassment, Squeeze out, Synergy, Touch base, UrinalWord Count: 6590Original Author: Ariel GoodbodySam works in the stupidest department of his company: the ‘Synergy Snakes’. What they’re actually supposed to do, he has no idea, but he’s managed to create a system where he doesn’t have to talk to his co-workers and does as little work as possible. The only problem is, the company is looking to get rid of some people, and Sam’s an easy target…